That time of year - again.
Time to focus on the year ahead…
Time to set some goals (or simply use last year's, if you can remember what they were).
Because goals are good. Except of course if you achieve them, because then you have nothing left to aim for which can be quite depressing.
So to avoid disappointment, my aim this year is not to set any goals.
Except for one.
Now I might be setting myself up for failure but I do believe that anything is possible.
That there are no limits to what you can achieve if you really set your mind to it.
And that dogs can read.
The cat is finally out of the bag.
Dogs can read.
So says Bonnie Bergin, mutt guru and author of the snappily titled 'Teach Your Dog To Read'.
I must admit that at first I thought the idea more than just a little far fetched but it turns out that Ms Bergin isn't completely bonkers after all.
And having flicked though the first few chapters of her paradigm-shifting book, the process appears remarkably similar to how we humans learn to read - by recognising patterns to which we then associate meanings, usually in the form of pictures.
(Remember at school stringing together the letters A-P-P-L-E while being shown a picture of a big red shiny err… apple?)
The book contains step-by-step instructions and helpful tips and explanations that even humans can understand.
So I'm going to have a crack at it.
This year will be the year that Mambo learns to read.
Perhaps just light fiction to start like the odd newspaper but if all goes well I'm hoping he'll develop a real appetite for books, just like when he was a puppy.
The implications of this startling discovery are literally quite staggering for dog owners and business people alike.
Because we all know that one of the main ways to save time and get more done each day is to get others to do the work for you.
And that one of the biggest time-consuming tasks we all do is read stuff - emails, reports, articles etc.
In fact it is estimated that the average employee spends 3-4 hours each and every day just reading stuff.
That's a lot of time simply reading.
And even more hours hunting for the same information to reread it because they didn't remember it when they read it the first time round.
Yet now for the measly cost of a few Schmackos you can delegate your daily reading to your dog, freeing you up to focus on much more important work tasks like keeping your Facebook site up to date.
This is truly one of the most cutting-edge and effective speed reading techniques known to man and hound alike.
Unfortunately Bergin's book is sadly missing a chapter on how to teach your dog to talk, but I guess she's saving that info for her next book.
But if you can't wait until then you could always buy a parrot.
Or a more sensible alternative for coping with information overload would be to invest a couple of hours to learn some simple, tried and tested memory and effective reading techniques.
After all, if dogs can read who knows what YOU are really capable of.
The Final Word: With a few quick and easy techniques you can tackle information overload once and for all, even if your dog can't read.
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